For those of you finding our family and this blog for the first time... These are our children, Evan who is 2 and Cora Grace who is 7 months old, they are both adopted from birth, here in the United States and this is their story:
After 9 years of marriage, years of failed fertility attempts and 2 years on the list to adopt... We were finally chosen to be parents by this beautiful young woman named Courtney. When she was 17, she found herself pregnant with no support from the birth father, at the time, no support or relationship with her father and stepmother and her mother had been killed in a horrible car accident a year before. She was in county jail when she heard of LDS Family Services. She choose us right away, telling us that we were the kind of family she always wanted but didn't have. When we met Courtney in Atlanta Georgia (we live in Tennessee), she was 4 weeks from her due date. She had a 'birth plan' that was that she wanted us to be there for the birth if we could, wants us to name the baby and she didn't want to hold the baby when he was born, at least not first or right away. We were supportive of her plan and besides that LOVED her! We felt so lucky to get to know her and spent a whole day with her, it was as if we always knew each other. The feeling was mutual. We went back to TN and prepared for our son to be born in 4 weeks only... 2 weeks later, he was on his way! We were called at 130am and hadn't gone to sleep yet (and wouldn't till the next night) so we packed the car, left a note on my salon door and messages for Mikes work and were in Atlanta by 830am. I got to hold Courtneys leg and count to 10 in her ear as she pushed. The scene was surreal. When Evan was born, she said "Your son! Your son is here!" She was so excited for us to finally have a family that she was oblivious of what she had just gone through herself. We cut the cord and were whisked in the adjoining room. About 45min later, she was ready for us to come visit before she got some rest and thankfully was ready to hold him. In her arms and tears in her eyes, she just looked at him and said, "He's a miracle, I created a miracle." He is just that and has been a joy to us every day. We are grateful she was able to see she was not ready to care a baby or the responsibilities of parenthood at that time. Evan will always be her son and we will always be his parents. We have an open adoption with her. She text messages us sometimes and we exchange pictures through social network sites as she has no computer or steady address to send things to. We always know she loves Evan and he will know that as he grows older.
This is Cora Grace. She came to us in a very unique way also. At the end of May, we submitted our updated Adoption paperwork for approval and were told it could take up to 10 weeks to hear back. That meant it would be until the first of August maybe before we could create a profile like these to present to birth mothers for their consideration. It was a bit of a bummer because we wanted to be in for June so the most time possible, birth mothers could view us. Well, 1 1/2 weeks later on June 1st a friend, Kristyn called from Sacramento to say that a woman she visit teaches from church, called her that morning to say she had a baby GIRL (no one knew she was pregnant although my friend did suspect and ask but was told no) this morning and needed her help to place her for adoption! I couldn't believe it! I called Mike immediately at work, we prayed about it, made some phone calls then called Kristyn back to tell her yes! We got to talk to the birth mom, Cyndee, on the phone that night. We found out from her own admittance that this baby was definately unplanned and she was in denial throughout the pregnancy. She is 40 and has a 20 year old daughter from her first marriage and 3 boys 9-12 yrs from her second marriage of which she is divorced and shares custody. She had no prenatal care, a history of drug and alcohol abuse but the baby was healthy. It sounds like a crazy story as I type it but seriously God carried us through those first few days and nothing scared us off. Cyndee sounded very nice and explained that really she felt she was a surrogate the whole time. She knew this baby was meant for someone who couldn't have children. Thankfully Kristyn called her parents in Southern California for advice and they reminded her that we wanted to adopt. The hardest part was that Cyndee's 20yr old daughter Jessica was having a really hard time letting go, understandably. I wouldn't get to address that till the next day. Needless to say, there was a lot to plan for and digest that night but I'm glad I did get sleep cause the next day would be the longest day of my life! The next morning, June 2nd as Evan and I were preparing to leave, our case worker called to tell us that our paperwork came back 2 days ago and they would approve us today! It was an amazing miracle. We went through similar preparation as we did with Evan to leave, I put a sign on my shop door and made phone calls but I also ran to the jeweler to pick a special necklace for Cyndee. Mike wouldn't be there till thursday night but Evan and I were leaving now on Wednesday afternoon. As an added miracle, my brother Jesse and his family lives in Sacramento also and we were able to stay with them... I got to meet Cyndee at 10pm when we flew in and the moment Cora touched my fingertips as Cyndee handed her to me, I knew she was mine and that I was in love instantly with her. I had a quick reassuring talk with her daughter Jessica who was there and sobbing that we wanted an open adoption where at the very least we share letters and pictures so she doesn't have to think Cora will disappear forever. I had a quick but wonderful prayer before meeting her and I could tell it was answered by the way she was able to accept what I said despite her sorrow a moment before. I am grateful for prayer and faith in prayer!! Because Cyndee had kept her pregnancy secret from even her family, there was no time to prepare every one for when the baby was born and she told them she planned to place her for adoption. That is something Jessica, who I do converse through email regularly, is still working to understand but she is very supportive now that she's gotten to know us. Thursday, I was allowed to take Cora Grace home after meeting her grand mother and a teenage girl cousin. Mike flew in that night and it was really special when he saw her for the first time. (Evan was oblivious to another child around forever but he transitioned into brotherhood naturally, thank goodness!) Friday we met with all Cyndee's immediate family that could come which included her 3 boys who were currently with their dad's custody time and had to be informed that their mom had a baby girl and they needed to come home to see her. It was a special visit that was unique. Below is a picture of Cyndee on the right with her 4 children. Jessica was still really emotional but she was gracious to take a picture to document the day. My brother and his wife were able to come spend time with Cyndee's family too which was great since everything happened so fast, it was good they could get a sence of my family in those few days.
Cora Grace is the most content baby you have ever seen. I tell people it would be easy to forget she's in the room, she's so quiet. She smiles at every one, and loves, loves, loves her brother! She pretty much giggles when he comes in a room which is special to us. We have an open adoption with C.G.'s family too, exchanging emails, we've sent pictures and are open to a visit in the future. When we go to California to visit my family who are in So. Ca, we plan to make more trips to Sacramento to visit with my brother but also see Cyndee's family if they want to.
We know these are our children, meant from the beginning to be in our family. We are grateful for the gift of Adoption where we can fulfill a dream to be parents. We cannot thank these families enough for the support and trust and love they have in us that they know we will raise these children the best we can.
If you know someone who is pregnant and not sure what to do, please invite them to contact LDS Family Services at http://www.itsaboutlove.org/ to get more information and ask questions about their situation. Pray for them to make the best choice for the child they are carrying. It is hard to place these babies in someone elses arms but sometimes, it is the right thing a very unselfish thing. God Bless.
